Tag Archives: Train

Make Mistakes

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Make Mistakes

Yes, this post is late on purpose. SMILE AND NOD.

6. You will make mistakes. Once you’re done beating yourself up, go back to the first entry.

So. Why would I send you ALLL the way back to unlearning the “Don’t hate the playa, hate the game” post? It’s simple…..and it’s not.

Here’s the thing. We live in a ridiculous world that’s made even more terrifying with the addition of social media.  Whether we want to admit it or not, we’re in a horrible loop of looking for approval and validation. We’re drawn to other people’s drama. We’re quick to judge the train wrecks happening in the lives of others with thumbs up or some other emoji. It’s a human thing.

When we post to social media and our own little “court” of followers, we are looking for approval and validation for ourselves. We are constantly trying to: course correct our social lives by asking the “hive mind” questions we can google on our own; get validation for our feelings and mindsets if there are few people locally who “grok” us; and sometimes we need that touch of assurance that we did the right thing when drama goes down in our own lives.

Did you catch it?

Here let me single it out for you:

.…”and sometimes we need that touch of assurance that we did the right thing when drama goes down in our own lives.”

Yeah, we’re constantly looking to be “right” in our lives, to always do things the “right” way, and to always get a pat on the head and a cookie when we “win.”

HOWEVER!

Humans don’t work that way. We make mistakes. We mess up. We don’t do things right all the time. And in the Kangaroo Court of Social media? One “misstep” can spiral our already low self esteem filled minds right to the depths of whatever hell we’ve made for ourselves.

It’s even worse when you’re living a Witch Life.

Most of us are studying alone. We don’t know exactly when the Gods and Spirits are talking to us. We don’t know all the pitfalls that are around us… AND, the last “elder” or mentor we had was stark raving mad… Ahem.

For the solitary practitioner, we’re obsessed with doing things “right” so we don’t accidentally curse ourselves or burn down our houses (remember the first two rules of Fire/Candle Magick).

Guess what? We’re not going to be 100% right all the time. That’s why you use your “book of shadows” / grimoire / journal to track your work. From there you can learn what works and what doesn’t – and what fails spectacularly. Remind me to tell you about the time I: 1. Almost burned down my house; and 2. Nearly cursed myself into oblivion.

Good times.

Now, that you’ve gotten through all that? Here come the warnings:

  1. RESIST THE URGE TO SHARE YOUR FAILURE. Are you’re talking to a trusted colleague who won’t talk down to you? With they help you fix it? If the answer is “no” just stop. You’re just setting yourself up for ridicule. AND! Yes, people who you think are your friends will definitely say some crap like “well you should have known, blah blah blah,” and you will get your feelings hurt. Also?
  2. RESIST THE URGE TO COMMENT NEGATIVELY ON THE FAILURES OF OTHERS. Lookit, we know that we messed up. If we’re talking about it? We are looking for that virtual hug while we clean up the mess. No need for “I told you so” or “I hope you’ve learned your lesson.” We get enough crap from our haters. We don’t need it from our friends. Why? Because:
  3. TRACK YOUR RESULTS: Good, bad or ugly, you need to know what happened so you can see where things went sideways or wrong. That journal of yours will be your lifesaver, cherry flavor, after time.
  4. Lastly, DON’T GIVE UP! The reason why we humans go through this horrible cycle of shame is so that we can evolve. When the first humans ate berries, no one knew which ones were poisonous… soooo you can see how that worked out. As a species, we look to the failures of others to make sure we don’t make the same mistake. And yet, taking those chances made us better human beings.

 

So take chances, get messy, and make mistakes. Learn from them. Forgive yourself, and get busy making more magic.

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Playa & Game

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As promised, here we go in depth for the things I’ve learned in the past few years. The first hurts the worst. Let’s rip the bandage off fast, yeah?

1. Unlearn the modern hip maxim “don’t hate the playa, hate the game.” Don’t bother hating unless you’re going to use that energy to get things done.

For those in the hip hop and subsequently hipster scene, ya’ll know this one. The translation is something like “all is fair in love and war” or “this is just business.” And it’s true. Not sorry. In the society we live it, we have a system. Sure, it’s broken. That’s the way it is.

 

For those are “spiritual,” you’ll run afoul of this system every damn day. Yup. Life ain’t fair. No country is perfect. Shit happens. Spells don’t seem to work, etc., ad nauseum. However, you don’t have to get used to it. Let’s talk about hate or rather getting angry that you can’t get what you want.

Emotions are energy. Read it again. Read it out loud. EMOTIONS ARE ENERGY.

You pay that spiritual hydro/energy bill in motivation and time. This is the same energy as love, happiness, success, power, desire, determination and the like. This is the stuff that gets you through bad times, and gives you a second wind when you got nothing left. The longer you spend any anger, hate, envy, and jealousy type emotions on a problem, person or situation? You are wasting precious energy that you can’t get back.

For those who have objections, depression and sadness are a whole other blog post. Bear with me.

So something went down in your life. Your spell didn’t seem to work. Someone sniped your EBay bidding war. Gossiping harpies got you fired from work. Insert the hate, anger, and frustration. You feel it. It’s vibrating under your skin. You can’t get that thing you spelled for (right now). The EBay listing was one of kind. The work harpies all got raises after you left. What good is your hate going to do?

My Chaos Magician friends and Alchemists will tell you to process that emotion. Break it down until the hate, anger, and frustration are in their purest form, which is simple energy. Now use it as fuel. Cast a new spell. Manifest that EBay listing for an item that is the same or better. Let the work harpies ruin their own lives while you move on to bigger and better things. Those who taunt you, throw curses at you, mock you and your failures, are simply trying to manipulate you. If you use all your energy getting mad? You can’t get even or ahead now can you?

Yeah it’s like that.

Now, this all sounds super easy in a blog post. It’s not. It’s hard. It’s exhausting. Know what? It’s also worth it. It’s worth every night of crying. It’s worth every bitten tongue when your failures are thrown in your face. It’s worth every second of meditation. Why? Once you’re done? You know every “playa.” You know what they are going to do and how they are going to do it. You will own the “game.” Sure, you’ll seem like a cold hearted ass at times. Yet it’s worth it.

It’s worth the hard work when you see the work harpies in the same position you left them years ago, while you’ve progressed and surpassed them. It’s worth the work to not only get a higher quality item from Ebay and to get it cheaper. It’s worth the work when you rework your spell and remove all the blockages to get more than you asked for AND have the original spell finally work.

Noli pati a scelestis opprimi

Don’t let the bastards grind you down

Palmam qui meruit ferat

Learn it and Earn it

Nihil boni sine labore

Nothing is earned without hard work

Laborare

GRIND!

 

The Blog Is Back

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The Blog Is Back

After a year and a half, I’m back. Things got bad. Then things got real bad. Then things got weird.

That’s when I got angry and sh-t got real.

 The rest of the backstory is boring. Let’s skip it for now. Let’s focus on when I got mad and things started happening. Since summer 2016, I learned a lot of things. There’s no divisive line of good or bad in those things. Just the truth I found for myself.  Funny thing is? When I spoke those truths, when I acted on those truths… Life changed for me.  Here are a few things I learned. I’ll go into depth in future posts.
1. Unlearn the modern hip maxim “don’t hate the playa, hate the game.”  Don’t bother hating unless you’re going to use that energy to get things done.
2. No one is under any obligation to help you out of any situation or teach you skills for free. #NotSorry
3. Humans are ultimately self serving. Each and every time, they will choose themselves over you. Deal with it.
4. When things go wrong, go back to the basics. Remember one of the lines in the Princess Bride: when things go wrong go back to the beginning.
5. There are no shortcuts to success or enlightenment.  #StillNotSorry
6. You will make mistakes. Once you’re done beating yourself up, go back to the number 4 entry.
7. It’s not your job to fix anyone else. Give them all the tools and encouragement… And walk away.
8. Your job is to fix you. If others learn from your example, great. If not? Move along.
9. The advice about hanging around successful people only works if you all have similar goals and you actually learn from the others and do the work.
10. You can’t be a spiritual leader in a vacuum. No tribe? No flock? No f-cks given by the gods.
11.  Whatever title you choose, unless your prayers or magick gets reliable results? You are wasting your time.
12. Drama will always go down. Mind your business and let it go down.
 Oh yeah, y’all. It’s gonna be like that. Happy New Year
Rev. Terrie

Celebrating Imbolc & Goddess Brigid ~ Pray ~ Love ~ Train ~ Create

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Celebrating Imbolc & Goddess Brigid

– this time? It’s personal

I’m sure you know of the Goddess known as Brigid.  She’s one of the most popular deities in the pagan spiritual movement.  Sometimes she’s seen as three sisters, other times as a triple deity. Some of Her domains are poetry, healing, and smithing (creation of tangible things).  While I have all of these things in my personal and spiritual life, that’s not why I honour Her.

Her followers are famous for flametending rituals or cills. They are famous for tending and caring for local public waterways.  They are famous for learning and speaking Gaelic. They are famous for weaving rushes for crosses to protect their homes. I don’t do any of those things. Goddess knows I’ve tried.

I honor Her for different reasons than most. The Goddess Brigid and I got personal. We got close.  We got “real” in a way I could finally understand.

She came to me in a dream, disguised as a waitress. She took away my food. She took away my seat at the table. She took away my husband’s food. She slacked at her own job in attending other patrons at restaurant.  A “snake oil” salesman came into the establishment and pestered the customers. She didn’t throw him out.

She made me so damn mad that I lost my temper.

For reference, I do my best not to lose my grip on my anger at any given point in time.  When angered, I’m not coherent – or nice. I scream. I yell. All the fires inside me roar – and burn everything in sight.  I am a dormant volcano. When I finally blow my top? I take an entire coastline of friendship and several hundred square miles of social niceties with me.

So there I am, no place at the table, starving and seeing that those around me are also not getting the nourishment they need. I knew that I was treated unjustly. I knew that the charlatan had fake magic potions. I knew that Table 9 needed more napkins and Table 19 needed more hot sauce.  So I lost my spiritual sh_t.

I let the fires inside me roar. I fed it the injustice given to me and the patrons of the restaurant. I fed it the anger that someone would willingly not care for those in their charge. I fed it a good dose of magical “b_tchslap” that I wanted to dole out to so many who take advantage of others in weaker states and positions.  Yes I got angry; then I got busy.

Instead of letting the rage boil me from the inside out, I stepped up and moved the “waitress” out of the way. As I yelled at Her (yes I know, just go with me on this), I did the job. I tossed out the snake oil salesman. I got Table 19 their hot sauce, fed my husband, got Table 9 more napkins and more. I took over and moved Her out of the way.

In my dream state, since She clearly wasn’t doing the job, someone had to step in to the role and take care of the people.  I did the job. I took care of the people and myself, all while yelling at Her from the top of my lungs.

Sigh. Yes this is where lucidity crept in to my dreaming mind.

The “waitress” just took it. She just stood there while I ripped Her apart. I stopped and realized that I couldn’t see her face. She was a glowing being of light that I could not focus on literally. That’s when I realized who She was – and panicked.

A little boy popped up at Her side. I’m sure that it was my patron god Lugh – goofy smile, mousy brown hair bleached blonde by the sun. He smiled and merely said “Sorry about that.”

This is where I woke up and had a spiritual meltdown.  This is also the reason why I honour Her. This is where Brigid and I got personal.

Brigid – the triple goddess, the lady of the hearth, the forge and the well deity of early spring, goddess of the sun, keeper of the flames – does not want me to be flametender. She doesn’t want me to tend the local waterways. She doesn’t want me to learn Gaelic or weave rushes. She doesn’t want me to solely write poetry or become and black, copper or silversmith.

She wants me to care for the people. She wants me to use my skills to make magic – to protect the people. She wants me to release the fires inside me, not just in anger, but in confidence that I can and I will do what needs be done.

In some ways I am Darlugdach, Her pupil. This was my dream of coal filled shoes.  Instead of intense desire for someone that would sway my faith, I had the intense desire not to be in the spotlight. I didn’t want to be the heavy in any situation where I had to make hard choices. I wanted all the magic, but was too afraid to do the work – in case I made a mistake.

This dream changed all of that.

I honour Brigid because it’s personal. She has shown me all of Her within myself.  To not take up Her mantle goes against everything I am.  Her flame burns within me. The lesson of the dream was to let it burn, bright and hot, to let the heat of the Fire work to help others.

Why do you honor Her?

Imbolc 2016

 

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Monday’s “Magic” Minute! ~ Pray ~ Train

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Monday's Magic Minute 2016

Got a misbehaving scrying mirror? Corny crystal ball? A pernicious pedantic pendulum? Here’s a quick way to cleanse them! Steep mugwort in hot water. When cool, “wash” your tools in the tea and let dry! Good luck!

RvT <3