You Fix You

8. Your job is to fix you. If others learn from your example, great. If not? Move along.

 

I learned a thing from one of my mentors this summer. (If she knew that this was about her, she’d be VERY upset with me. HI PAM!) Here’s the thing:  A priestess or priest runs rituals, ceremonies and creates spiritual experiences for themselves. If anyone else, wants to come along, do the work and do the homework, that’s great. If not? Oh well.

Ya’ll……

YA’LL!!!!!

That very thought added a foundation to my ideas of what a priestess is, stuck a pin where I have my convictions and made the globe of “who am I?” stop spinning.

I stopped waiting for my community to formally recognize me as a priestess. I stopped fantasizing over a regal neck torc and elaborate ceremony to get it.  I realize now that I fully believed that the ceremony and the ‘thing’ of getting a torc were the end all and be all of a priestess.  Honestly, they just part of the window dressing. Those things are not what makes me a priestess.

NO Lia Fáil NEEDED.

Forget the super expensive brass or gold neck torc. I went out, got a functioning wrist one – made with copper and bullets – and got back to work.

Once my head stopped spinning, I took a look at my ritual archive. No, not of the ones I’ve done publically – the “other” one.  I have a scary impressive bank of ideas, rituals, thought processes and ceremonies that I’ve never felt I had the support to pull off.

I’ve got a full year long devotion made for my patron god.  (Don’t worry, I’m recovering the website.)

 

I’ve got a proposal for creating a new way to learn to be a bard by using what we have available.

I can travel with my own painted labyrinth when introspection is needed:

I can make a mean magic potion

I know what I am. I know who I am. I know what I want to do in my spiritual life. And, if ya’ll want to come along for the ride? Do the homework and get a helmet. Cuz I got this idea for a road opening ritual that will be pretty epic… along with a few more crazy ideas.

Who am I? You can call me Rev Terrie Mountain Fire

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Make Mistakes

Make Mistakes

Yes, this post is late on purpose. SMILE AND NOD.

6. You will make mistakes. Once you’re done beating yourself up, go back to the first entry.

So. Why would I send you ALLL the way back to unlearning the “Don’t hate the playa, hate the game” post? It’s simple…..and it’s not.

Here’s the thing. We live in a ridiculous world that’s made even more terrifying with the addition of social media.  Whether we want to admit it or not, we’re in a horrible loop of looking for approval and validation. We’re drawn to other people’s drama. We’re quick to judge the train wrecks happening in the lives of others with thumbs up or some other emoji. It’s a human thing.

When we post to social media and our own little “court” of followers, we are looking for approval and validation for ourselves. We are constantly trying to: course correct our social lives by asking the “hive mind” questions we can google on our own; get validation for our feelings and mindsets if there are few people locally who “grok” us; and sometimes we need that touch of assurance that we did the right thing when drama goes down in our own lives.

Did you catch it?

Here let me single it out for you:

.…”and sometimes we need that touch of assurance that we did the right thing when drama goes down in our own lives.”

Yeah, we’re constantly looking to be “right” in our lives, to always do things the “right” way, and to always get a pat on the head and a cookie when we “win.”

HOWEVER!

Humans don’t work that way. We make mistakes. We mess up. We don’t do things right all the time. And in the Kangaroo Court of Social media? One “misstep” can spiral our already low self esteem filled minds right to the depths of whatever hell we’ve made for ourselves.

It’s even worse when you’re living a Witch Life.

Most of us are studying alone. We don’t know exactly when the Gods and Spirits are talking to us. We don’t know all the pitfalls that are around us… AND, the last “elder” or mentor we had was stark raving mad… Ahem.

For the solitary practitioner, we’re obsessed with doing things “right” so we don’t accidentally curse ourselves or burn down our houses (remember the first two rules of Fire/Candle Magick).

Guess what? We’re not going to be 100% right all the time. That’s why you use your “book of shadows” / grimoire / journal to track your work. From there you can learn what works and what doesn’t – and what fails spectacularly. Remind me to tell you about the time I: 1. Almost burned down my house; and 2. Nearly cursed myself into oblivion.

Good times.

Now, that you’ve gotten through all that? Here come the warnings:

  1. RESIST THE URGE TO SHARE YOUR FAILURE. Are you’re talking to a trusted colleague who won’t talk down to you? With they help you fix it? If the answer is “no” just stop. You’re just setting yourself up for ridicule. AND! Yes, people who you think are your friends will definitely say some crap like “well you should have known, blah blah blah,” and you will get your feelings hurt. Also?
  2. RESIST THE URGE TO COMMENT NEGATIVELY ON THE FAILURES OF OTHERS. Lookit, we know that we messed up. If we’re talking about it? We are looking for that virtual hug while we clean up the mess. No need for “I told you so” or “I hope you’ve learned your lesson.” We get enough crap from our haters. We don’t need it from our friends. Why? Because:
  3. TRACK YOUR RESULTS: Good, bad or ugly, you need to know what happened so you can see where things went sideways or wrong. That journal of yours will be your lifesaver, cherry flavor, after time.
  4. Lastly, DON’T GIVE UP! The reason why we humans go through this horrible cycle of shame is so that we can evolve. When the first humans ate berries, no one knew which ones were poisonous… soooo you can see how that worked out. As a species, we look to the failures of others to make sure we don’t make the same mistake. And yet, taking those chances made us better human beings.

 

So take chances, get messy, and make mistakes. Learn from them. Forgive yourself, and get busy making more magic.

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No Shortcuts

No Shortcuts

We skipped spring and went right into summer. As I look down at my pot belly and realise that I’m not going to fit in last year’s clothes, I’m reminded of the next lesson like a smack upside the head. Dieting and exercising now is too late.
5. There are no shortcuts to success or enlightenment. I’m not even sorry.
What does that mean? If I had a dollar for every time someone wanted a quick fix spell, stone, potion, oil or whatever to fix their life or their problems, we’d be having a much different conversation.
TL; DR: IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY!
OK here we go. Calling yourself a witch, wizard, magician or whatever title of the year and not actively practicing magic or energy work is pointless. That’s right, I’m calling ya’ll out. If you don’t do the work? The title doesn’t fricken matter. Know why people don’t practice? Because it’s work.
That’s right. Practicing magic takes work. It takes less work to quit smoking cold turkey than to use magic to empower stones, herbs and spells to quit smoking. Don’t believe me? Go ask your elders. I’ll wait. Mean while, enjoy this lovely quote.
 
And we’re back. Didn’t like those answers eh? Didn’t think so. So why do magic at all? It’s a way to regulate our own personal energy. Lemme say it again. It’s a way to regulate our OWN PERSONAL ENERGY – not the moon’s energy, not the sun’s energy, not the ocean’s energy, not the trees’ energy – OUR OWN.
Me? I got a Fire Moon, I got a lot a passion and rage boiling inside. Doing the energy work helps me regulate what I have and keep control of my flames. Why? I keep control so that in the event that I need to work fast and hard I can turn on my fire and power up almost any spell or candle in a moment’s notice.
 
Now, for those of you who are wondering about the shortcut angle, here it is. I’ve been a witch 14 years. The first ten years sucked. A LOT. Why? I tried to find shortcuts to everything. I desperately tried every spell that I didn’t have to use my own energy for because I was a lazy uneducated shortcut seeking witch.
 
What happened? I got real broke, real fast. It’s EXPENSIVE to keep trying spells, buying stones, getting jewelry and the like in an effort to make the magic *go*. Yeah, about that. It didn’t work. But something *did* work. I wanted big changes in my life and whoo boy did I get them. I also got a smack upside the head about what devotion to the gods, my community and my magic really meant.
 
The first thing? I had to take care of myself. That’s not right. First I had to learn discipline. I had to learn to not just take care of myself, but to KEEP taking care of myself. Yes, that meant going to bed at reasonable time, eating my vegetables, laying off the cheap booze and taking my medication. Stay with me on this, there is a point. After that? Laundry, making my bed and keeping the clutter out of the house. Those things are key just like taking care of myself. Like I said, it’s not just doing it once. It’s keeping the ball rolling and staying on top of things even when you’re sick, tired, drunk or otherwise not really thinking about things. There’s a point I swear.
Now if you’re picking up what I’m putting down, go with me a bit further. If you do all these things, then you’re ready to get on with the magic. DO THE DOGGONE ENERGETIC EXERCISES EVERYDAY. You can do it! How do I know? You’ve set yourself up for success. Migraine? No biggie. You’ve manage to take out the garbage and do laundry with a migraine. Visualization is a snap. Hungover? Whatever. You’ve managed to make groceries, make the bed and go to work hung over. Cleansing your energy and resetting your shield is no big thing.
NOW WE GET TO THE POINT!
So you’ve got the discipline down. No matter what happens, you’ve got your energy work down and under control. Then something happens. You get the phone call that something is going down and you need to work some mojo. Guess what? You won’t fly off the handle and half ass a spell. Why? FRICKEN DISCIPLINE. You got this. You know how to control your energy power through anything.
So here we are, it’s after you’ve just thrown the bones and thrown down. Guess what you’re going to feel like afterward? SICK AND HUNGOVER. Guess what else? You got this. You know how to take care of yourself sick and hungover. You know how to reset your own energy and work with it to get back on track.
It’s all making sense, yeah? So that was the good news. Here’s the bad news: This doesn’t happen over night. It takes lots of time. If you’re really adept at energy work? It will take six months to a year to completely get control. If you’re lazy like me? It will take longer.
 
Now? I can power up almost any time for almost anything. I can access the energy around me (we’ll teach that later, kids), in the event that I’m tapped out. If there is a ritual or magic working that I have to give my all and then some? I got it down. And when it’s all over? I have the energy cleansing rituals on auto pilot when I shower and go to bed. I’ll be able to feed myself and take my meds. I’ll be able to get to work next day and only be a bit grumpy.

TANSTAAFL

TANSTAAFL ~ There ain’t no such thing as a free lunch

Here we are, back to the things I’ve learned while away from the blog.

  1. No one is under any obligation to help you out of any situation or teach you skills for free.

That’s right. There Ain’t No Such Thing As A Free Lunch.

The internet, books from the library, shared skills – none of it is free.  Google gets money from ads.  Facebook is reading your posts and using the information for their marketing engines. The library is subsidized by the province.  You pay taxes to the province. See where we’re going? Even if you share your skills, there should be something you are getting out it. If there isn’t? You’re headed for burnout and feeling unappreciated. All the Reiki people will tell you that when you give a service, there should be an energetic exchange of some kind. The easiest “exchange” is money.

This isn’t spiritual. This is human economics. Don’t believe me? This is from 

3. Production has costs

There is no such thing as a free lunch. Getting something apparently gratis only means that some other person pays for it. Behind every welfare check and each research grant lies the tax money of real people. While the taxpayers see that government confiscates part of one’s personal income, they do not know to whom this money goes; and while the recipients of government expenditures see the government handing the money to them, they do not know from whom the government has taken away this money.

What does this mean when it comes to the spiritual workers? Don’t get mad when your “I just want to ask you a question” is met with “You can book an appointment or consultation for $25.” Before ya’ll get your knickers in a twist, here’s the reason why:

Spiritual workers spend YEARS honing their crafts. In money terms, that means tens of thousands of dollars spent on research, supplies, courses, books and the like. Most spiritual workers still have “day jobs.” So all the money they could be putting towards retirement? They spent studying.

Spiritual workers are usually in the throes of “shaman sickness” because they are giving too much of their work away for free. So that “one question” you have ( that turns into a dissertation) means they now can’t afford to feed themselves right, take time off or get their own medications.

(For those who are wondering, if you’re feeling ashamed, that’s not my intent. That’s a perk of the information. You’re welcome.)

So let’s say that some Spiritual Worker is generous and gives you their time and information. GET THEM SOMETHING IN RETURN. Buy them coffee or lunch. Brag about them to your friends. Post a good review. Carry their bags. Help them set up or break down at events.

Hey, I hear the cheap white light people in the back saying “It’s a gods given gift! You should do it for free!” Hey, guess what? No service in any Christian service I’ve seen is free. It’s paid for by parishioners and congregations. Not even Jesus did things for free. He (apparently) paid for everything with his LIFE.

Now to be fair, I know some of ya’ll are broke or just making ends meet. Still, no free lunch. Do the homework known as the energy exercises I keep asking after. For myself, if I know you’re doing the work, I’ll see results. This is a form a payment. You are learning the skills taught and using them to make your life better. I’ll take it. But ya gotta do the dang work!

So you don’t want to do the energy work? Fine. Everything else is going to be infinitely harder and the magic costs will be greater. No money? STILL NO FREE LUNCH. Get to working for your spiritual worker. Run errands, share their posts, and do all you can in lieu of money to show your worker that you value what they do.

And if you don’t want to do any of those things? Wellll. don’t be surprised when…..

PS.

DON”T ASK FOR COUPONS. To do so means you don’t value the actual product, you’re just cheap.

 

Playa & Game

As promised, here we go in depth for the things I’ve learned in the past few years. The first hurts the worst. Let’s rip the bandage off fast, yeah?

1. Unlearn the modern hip maxim “don’t hate the playa, hate the game.” Don’t bother hating unless you’re going to use that energy to get things done.

For those in the hip hop and subsequently hipster scene, ya’ll know this one. The translation is something like “all is fair in love and war” or “this is just business.” And it’s true. Not sorry. In the society we live it, we have a system. Sure, it’s broken. That’s the way it is.

 

For those are “spiritual,” you’ll run afoul of this system every damn day. Yup. Life ain’t fair. No country is perfect. Shit happens. Spells don’t seem to work, etc., ad nauseum. However, you don’t have to get used to it. Let’s talk about hate or rather getting angry that you can’t get what you want.

Emotions are energy. Read it again. Read it out loud. EMOTIONS ARE ENERGY.

You pay that spiritual hydro/energy bill in motivation and time. This is the same energy as love, happiness, success, power, desire, determination and the like. This is the stuff that gets you through bad times, and gives you a second wind when you got nothing left. The longer you spend any anger, hate, envy, and jealousy type emotions on a problem, person or situation? You are wasting precious energy that you can’t get back.

For those who have objections, depression and sadness are a whole other blog post. Bear with me.

So something went down in your life. Your spell didn’t seem to work. Someone sniped your EBay bidding war. Gossiping harpies got you fired from work. Insert the hate, anger, and frustration. You feel it. It’s vibrating under your skin. You can’t get that thing you spelled for (right now). The EBay listing was one of kind. The work harpies all got raises after you left. What good is your hate going to do?

My Chaos Magician friends and Alchemists will tell you to process that emotion. Break it down until the hate, anger, and frustration are in their purest form, which is simple energy. Now use it as fuel. Cast a new spell. Manifest that EBay listing for an item that is the same or better. Let the work harpies ruin their own lives while you move on to bigger and better things. Those who taunt you, throw curses at you, mock you and your failures, are simply trying to manipulate you. If you use all your energy getting mad? You can’t get even or ahead now can you?

Yeah it’s like that.

Now, this all sounds super easy in a blog post. It’s not. It’s hard. It’s exhausting. Know what? It’s also worth it. It’s worth every night of crying. It’s worth every bitten tongue when your failures are thrown in your face. It’s worth every second of meditation. Why? Once you’re done? You know every “playa.” You know what they are going to do and how they are going to do it. You will own the “game.” Sure, you’ll seem like a cold hearted ass at times. Yet it’s worth it.

It’s worth the hard work when you see the work harpies in the same position you left them years ago, while you’ve progressed and surpassed them. It’s worth the work to not only get a higher quality item from Ebay and to get it cheaper. It’s worth the work when you rework your spell and remove all the blockages to get more than you asked for AND have the original spell finally work.

Noli pati a scelestis opprimi

Don’t let the bastards grind you down

Palmam qui meruit ferat

Learn it and Earn it

Nihil boni sine labore

Nothing is earned without hard work

Laborare

GRIND!