Asking for Help

 

  1. It is not enough just knowing when to ask for help. You have to know WHO to ask.

As a pagan and witch, I live in a world of Venn diagrams.  While some may share parts of my ideals, their entire world view may not be the same. That’s not a complaint. That’s just a fact. Furthermore, even if someone else shares most of my views, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they can help me in a time a crisis, magical or mundane. Again, not a complaint, just a fact. A few more just for giggles, we have to factor in how far way that “help” is in terms of: do they have their own life; have they just finished working way too man shifts and are burned out; are they in their own crisis mode; are they literally hours away in the form of distance and time zones; will my problems be a burden to them; did my spirits tell me to ask someone else; and a whole other host of parameters.

 

What all of this boils down to is that when the big mojo is going down, I may not ask YOU in particular for help. That’s not a slam on you. It’s just how I have to roll. Now this can go bad a number of ways.

 

When I began this path, there was this unspoken rule of “self sufficiency.” You broke it? You fix it.  We all know that doesn’t work out. Why? In this world of “Insta-Witchery” and “Credit Card Conjure,” it’s real easy to follow instructions from any webpage or conjure kit and find that you’ve cursed yourself. It’s not so easy to figure out how to undo those things. Now, as time passed and I learned better, that self sufficiency bullshit can still bite me in the ass. Why? Let’s talk about the shame you can feel when you have to admit that you messed up and can’t fix it.

Yeah. That.

It’s hard enough to admit that you’ve messed up. No one wants to get a dressing down from anyone. In that cycle of self shame, we imagine all kinds horrible things that someone could tell us about our follies. However, that’s not my warning in this. My warning is about those “teachers” and “elders” that will make you feel TERRIBLE while they “attempt” to “help” you out.

Yeah. Them.

Here’s where the witch earns their wand, though. Many of these teachers and elders have no idea how to help you – and they won’t even say that they can’t. The humiliation alone will be enough to drive seekers away and into the arms of apathy.  In my work with Beaux Magique, the hardest part is convincing people that they can come to me if they mess up. Hell, come to me BEFORE you do the crazy magic so we can keep the mistakes to a minimum.

So yeah, send out that help signal when you need it. However, please think hard about those who you accept help and assistance from.

 

 

Looking for more of me? Please consider supporting me on RedBubble or a giving me a Paypal tip https://paypal.me/BMQRVT/5

 

It’s not osmosis

9. The advice about hanging around successful people only works if you all have similar goals and you actually learn from the others. Hang out with billionaires all you want. Unless you stop buying lottery tickets or shit you don’t need, guess what?

It’s not Osmosis, people. However, it goes deeper than that.

You can buy all the statues you want. You can purchase all the cool clothing from local vendors that you wish. You can even buy all the oils, sprays, and ritual items that your heart desires. You can drop every dollar you have and get the really big tattoos of your gods, and faith. Guess what?

Artwork by Teemu Jahani

IT MEANS NOTHING UNLESS YOU ARE ACTUALLY FOLLOWING THE PATH.

Yeah you can get all those things. Unless you’re doing the homework, you’re gonna fail the whole dang course. Having the fully decked out Instagram-esque aesthetic altar is nice. It’ll get you lots of likes and lots of attention. Don’t actually *work* that altar? Ha ha ha. Cuz that’s what the gods and spirits are gonna do when you actually try to petition them for something.

However, it goes deeper than that.

You can buy all the books you want. You can listen to all the podcasts you want. You can watch all the videos you want. You can buy all the magazines you want. Unless you are taking notes and using the information? IT MEANS NOTHING. Sure you can parrot to your Wannbe Wednesday witches that you heard of or saw that using rosemary in any spellwork is totally acceptable (It’s not by the way.). That might make you look “cool” or whatever you think is cool. Ya’ll know what I’m gonna say, right? IT MEANS NOTHING. If you’re doing the homework, journaling your spellwork and following the instructions? You will have a long record of RESULTS to show what herbs are truly effective for you.

And that’s what I’ve been getting at. All the successful people you idolize? They are RESULTS driven. You want to see change happen in your life? You want to have all the things? This ain’t osmosis. You learn and put those lessons in to effect.

WERK.

 

Looking for more of me? Please consider supporting me on Patreon, supporting me on RedBubble or a Paypal tip https://paypal.me/BMQRVT/5

 

You Fix You

8. Your job is to fix you. If others learn from your example, great. If not? Move along.

 

I learned a thing from one of my mentors this summer. (If she knew that this was about her, she’d be VERY upset with me. HI PAM!) Here’s the thing:  A priestess or priest runs rituals, ceremonies and creates spiritual experiences for themselves. If anyone else, wants to come along, do the work and do the homework, that’s great. If not? Oh well.

Ya’ll……

YA’LL!!!!!

That very thought added a foundation to my ideas of what a priestess is, stuck a pin where I have my convictions and made the globe of “who am I?” stop spinning.

I stopped waiting for my community to formally recognize me as a priestess. I stopped fantasizing over a regal neck torc and elaborate ceremony to get it.  I realize now that I fully believed that the ceremony and the ‘thing’ of getting a torc were the end all and be all of a priestess.  Honestly, they just part of the window dressing. Those things are not what makes me a priestess.

NO Lia Fáil NEEDED.

Forget the super expensive brass or gold neck torc. I went out, got a functioning wrist one – made with copper and bullets – and got back to work.

Once my head stopped spinning, I took a look at my ritual archive. No, not of the ones I’ve done publically – the “other” one.  I have a scary impressive bank of ideas, rituals, thought processes and ceremonies that I’ve never felt I had the support to pull off.

I’ve got a full year long devotion made for my patron god.  (Don’t worry, I’m recovering the website.)

 

I’ve got a proposal for creating a new way to learn to be a bard by using what we have available.

I can travel with my own painted labyrinth when introspection is needed:

I can make a mean magic potion

I know what I am. I know who I am. I know what I want to do in my spiritual life. And, if ya’ll want to come along for the ride? Do the homework and get a helmet. Cuz I got this idea for a road opening ritual that will be pretty epic… along with a few more crazy ideas.

Who am I? You can call me Rev Terrie Mountain Fire

Looking for more of me? Please consider supporting me on Patreon, supporting me on RedBubble or a Paypal tip https://paypal.me/BMQRVT/5

 

Make Mistakes

Make Mistakes

Yes, this post is late on purpose. SMILE AND NOD.

6. You will make mistakes. Once you’re done beating yourself up, go back to the first entry.

So. Why would I send you ALLL the way back to unlearning the “Don’t hate the playa, hate the game” post? It’s simple…..and it’s not.

Here’s the thing. We live in a ridiculous world that’s made even more terrifying with the addition of social media.  Whether we want to admit it or not, we’re in a horrible loop of looking for approval and validation. We’re drawn to other people’s drama. We’re quick to judge the train wrecks happening in the lives of others with thumbs up or some other emoji. It’s a human thing.

When we post to social media and our own little “court” of followers, we are looking for approval and validation for ourselves. We are constantly trying to: course correct our social lives by asking the “hive mind” questions we can google on our own; get validation for our feelings and mindsets if there are few people locally who “grok” us; and sometimes we need that touch of assurance that we did the right thing when drama goes down in our own lives.

Did you catch it?

Here let me single it out for you:

.…”and sometimes we need that touch of assurance that we did the right thing when drama goes down in our own lives.”

Yeah, we’re constantly looking to be “right” in our lives, to always do things the “right” way, and to always get a pat on the head and a cookie when we “win.”

HOWEVER!

Humans don’t work that way. We make mistakes. We mess up. We don’t do things right all the time. And in the Kangaroo Court of Social media? One “misstep” can spiral our already low self esteem filled minds right to the depths of whatever hell we’ve made for ourselves.

It’s even worse when you’re living a Witch Life.

Most of us are studying alone. We don’t know exactly when the Gods and Spirits are talking to us. We don’t know all the pitfalls that are around us… AND, the last “elder” or mentor we had was stark raving mad… Ahem.

For the solitary practitioner, we’re obsessed with doing things “right” so we don’t accidentally curse ourselves or burn down our houses (remember the first two rules of Fire/Candle Magick).

Guess what? We’re not going to be 100% right all the time. That’s why you use your “book of shadows” / grimoire / journal to track your work. From there you can learn what works and what doesn’t – and what fails spectacularly. Remind me to tell you about the time I: 1. Almost burned down my house; and 2. Nearly cursed myself into oblivion.

Good times.

Now, that you’ve gotten through all that? Here come the warnings:

  1. RESIST THE URGE TO SHARE YOUR FAILURE. Are you’re talking to a trusted colleague who won’t talk down to you? With they help you fix it? If the answer is “no” just stop. You’re just setting yourself up for ridicule. AND! Yes, people who you think are your friends will definitely say some crap like “well you should have known, blah blah blah,” and you will get your feelings hurt. Also?
  2. RESIST THE URGE TO COMMENT NEGATIVELY ON THE FAILURES OF OTHERS. Lookit, we know that we messed up. If we’re talking about it? We are looking for that virtual hug while we clean up the mess. No need for “I told you so” or “I hope you’ve learned your lesson.” We get enough crap from our haters. We don’t need it from our friends. Why? Because:
  3. TRACK YOUR RESULTS: Good, bad or ugly, you need to know what happened so you can see where things went sideways or wrong. That journal of yours will be your lifesaver, cherry flavor, after time.
  4. Lastly, DON’T GIVE UP! The reason why we humans go through this horrible cycle of shame is so that we can evolve. When the first humans ate berries, no one knew which ones were poisonous… soooo you can see how that worked out. As a species, we look to the failures of others to make sure we don’t make the same mistake. And yet, taking those chances made us better human beings.

 

So take chances, get messy, and make mistakes. Learn from them. Forgive yourself, and get busy making more magic.

Looking for more of me? Please consider supporting me on Patreon, supporting me on RedBubble or a Paypal tip https://paypal.me/BMQRVT/5

 

 

No Shortcuts

No Shortcuts

We skipped spring and went right into summer. As I look down at my pot belly and realise that I’m not going to fit in last year’s clothes, I’m reminded of the next lesson like a smack upside the head. Dieting and exercising now is too late.
5. There are no shortcuts to success or enlightenment. I’m not even sorry.
What does that mean? If I had a dollar for every time someone wanted a quick fix spell, stone, potion, oil or whatever to fix their life or their problems, we’d be having a much different conversation.
TL; DR: IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY!
OK here we go. Calling yourself a witch, wizard, magician or whatever title of the year and not actively practicing magic or energy work is pointless. That’s right, I’m calling ya’ll out. If you don’t do the work? The title doesn’t fricken matter. Know why people don’t practice? Because it’s work.
That’s right. Practicing magic takes work. It takes less work to quit smoking cold turkey than to use magic to empower stones, herbs and spells to quit smoking. Don’t believe me? Go ask your elders. I’ll wait. Mean while, enjoy this lovely quote.
 
And we’re back. Didn’t like those answers eh? Didn’t think so. So why do magic at all? It’s a way to regulate our own personal energy. Lemme say it again. It’s a way to regulate our OWN PERSONAL ENERGY – not the moon’s energy, not the sun’s energy, not the ocean’s energy, not the trees’ energy – OUR OWN.
Me? I got a Fire Moon, I got a lot a passion and rage boiling inside. Doing the energy work helps me regulate what I have and keep control of my flames. Why? I keep control so that in the event that I need to work fast and hard I can turn on my fire and power up almost any spell or candle in a moment’s notice.
 
Now, for those of you who are wondering about the shortcut angle, here it is. I’ve been a witch 14 years. The first ten years sucked. A LOT. Why? I tried to find shortcuts to everything. I desperately tried every spell that I didn’t have to use my own energy for because I was a lazy uneducated shortcut seeking witch.
 
What happened? I got real broke, real fast. It’s EXPENSIVE to keep trying spells, buying stones, getting jewelry and the like in an effort to make the magic *go*. Yeah, about that. It didn’t work. But something *did* work. I wanted big changes in my life and whoo boy did I get them. I also got a smack upside the head about what devotion to the gods, my community and my magic really meant.
 
The first thing? I had to take care of myself. That’s not right. First I had to learn discipline. I had to learn to not just take care of myself, but to KEEP taking care of myself. Yes, that meant going to bed at reasonable time, eating my vegetables, laying off the cheap booze and taking my medication. Stay with me on this, there is a point. After that? Laundry, making my bed and keeping the clutter out of the house. Those things are key just like taking care of myself. Like I said, it’s not just doing it once. It’s keeping the ball rolling and staying on top of things even when you’re sick, tired, drunk or otherwise not really thinking about things. There’s a point I swear.
Now if you’re picking up what I’m putting down, go with me a bit further. If you do all these things, then you’re ready to get on with the magic. DO THE DOGGONE ENERGETIC EXERCISES EVERYDAY. You can do it! How do I know? You’ve set yourself up for success. Migraine? No biggie. You’ve manage to take out the garbage and do laundry with a migraine. Visualization is a snap. Hungover? Whatever. You’ve managed to make groceries, make the bed and go to work hung over. Cleansing your energy and resetting your shield is no big thing.
NOW WE GET TO THE POINT!
So you’ve got the discipline down. No matter what happens, you’ve got your energy work down and under control. Then something happens. You get the phone call that something is going down and you need to work some mojo. Guess what? You won’t fly off the handle and half ass a spell. Why? FRICKEN DISCIPLINE. You got this. You know how to control your energy power through anything.
So here we are, it’s after you’ve just thrown the bones and thrown down. Guess what you’re going to feel like afterward? SICK AND HUNGOVER. Guess what else? You got this. You know how to take care of yourself sick and hungover. You know how to reset your own energy and work with it to get back on track.
It’s all making sense, yeah? So that was the good news. Here’s the bad news: This doesn’t happen over night. It takes lots of time. If you’re really adept at energy work? It will take six months to a year to completely get control. If you’re lazy like me? It will take longer.
 
Now? I can power up almost any time for almost anything. I can access the energy around me (we’ll teach that later, kids), in the event that I’m tapped out. If there is a ritual or magic working that I have to give my all and then some? I got it down. And when it’s all over? I have the energy cleansing rituals on auto pilot when I shower and go to bed. I’ll be able to feed myself and take my meds. I’ll be able to get to work next day and only be a bit grumpy.